I could care less but that would certainy not help to dethaw my icy heart. Don’t judge ivoryonics because I can almost gaurantee that your vocabulary contains one or more of these unharmoniously plucked chords. I could also take the time to explain what is wrong with these statements but then again you are either reading this article because you want to see just how moronic the author is, or you understand the word play and would like to know if I am clever as I seem.
Having majored in English in college I fancy myself a cunning linguist of sorts and am particularly interested in Ebonics and Ivoryonics. I truly admire black people in our country because they have gone through and are still going through tremendous harships (yes they are, don’t argue with me). Ebonics has become such a prominent part of the black culture that some schools in California some years ago wanted to teach Ebonics as an alternative language. This angered some and made others. . .[insert emotion]. Anyway, you ain’t gotta talk like someone to know what they sayin’, ya’ heard? To some this seems as completely incorrect English but who the hell really wants to learn English from a nation of people who practice Ivoryonics. Everyday conversation in the US has turned into a laughable version of a language derived from our once oppresive British counterparts. I’m not completely sure but them Brits ain’t got no contractions, don’t use double negatives and are always gonna think of us as barefoot hillbillies who broke away from their oppressive rule and massacred their language.
Do you read? Of course you do, what am I thinking? In the last book, article, or shampoo bottle you read was it proper English or was some type of slang involved? Most writing is in fact in proper English and we deviate from it to speak. It is similar to tucking in your button up shirt and combing your hair to go out in public, then unbuttoning your pants and shirt and messing up your hair when you get home. You have gone from at least a mildly pleasing appearance to completely unsightly. The same goes for spoken languge. If someone enunciates completely without using contractions it is almost painful to the ears and if you were to read slang, you could potentially vomit on the paper in front of your face.
Something can be supposable but supposedly you understand English, and the same difference makes no sense when you are trying to say ‘same thing’. Regardless of what anyone says, adding the ‘ir’ is not only incorrect but cancels out the word as a double negative but that is another story or a whole other story if you will. Also, a lot (there is no such word as ‘alot’, it is two words) of the time when I hear about dethawing I think of someone thawing something and then re-freezing it but saying I could care less about this means that to some undetermined degree I care about this a bit when I actually meant that ‘I could not care less if a person chooses to say dethaw’. There is also ‘toward’ which is prononouned ‘toe-ward’ but usually comes out as ‘tward’ but now I am just getting plain nerdy.
So what does it all mean? As a linquist of sorts I become almost irritatingly (to myself) nerdy about pronuncuation and enunciation of words and proper use of common phrases. Far be it from me to corrrect someone as cool as Billy Dee Williams or anybody for that matter on proper linguistics. It is just something I have noticed and am sure it will now consume you as well. Or should I say it will consume you as good?
There are many ism’s in our society but the most prevalent and subtle (or not so subtle after all) are racism and sexism. Our system is set up and run by caucasian males with ‘insignificant penile issues’. Why does that matter and what the hell does it have to do with the ism’s? Everything.
Crusty old white men have been in charge of politics and banking since the US was stolen and renamed. So who was oppressed at the time? Women and black people. Women were good enough to have sex with and do chores for the crusty old white men and black people did the backbreaking work for them. With the abolition of slavery, black people were still subjected to Jim Crowe style laws which would result in more black men being in prison as part of chain gangs, still building things. Then after almost a decade, they were supposedly given ‘equal rights’. Bullshit. Women were the ones holding down the fort while all of our boys were overseas fighting wars so our crusty, little dick, oppressive overlords could line their pockets. Then eventually with the help of people like Susan B. Anthony, women were given equal rights’. Bullshit.
It is now 2012 and with the end of the Maya calendar upon us, we still cannot treat each other with respect because we have different crusty, little dick, oppressive, corporate overlords keeping us separate. Republicans and Democrats argue and mudsling and we follow suit because we figure ‘why would our politicians and media lie to us?’. Behind the layers of deciet there are still many ism’s kept alive by many people in our society. Women do not make the same amount of money as men. Don’t you tell me bullshit, I’ve seen it. They are also offered higher interest rates on credit cards and it is offensive for a man to be called a ‘pussy’. We even elected a black president before a woman president, which leads to my next point.
Black people are still very oppressed and do not have as equal of rights as is purported. Why is it that so many black men are in jail? And why is it that in every ‘black’ neighborhood there is a liquor store or gun store on just about every street corner? Why is it that crack is generally only found in ‘black’ neighborhoods? None of these are a coincidence.
Since having a ‘black president’ I have found that people are more prone to judging him based on his color, moreso than his accolades or failures. On more than several occasions, I have heard in daily life, social media, and even major news media people saying ‘the black president’ when referring to Obama. I want to say, “why don’t you just call him an ‘n’ word, you racist?”
My four year old and I watched Star Wars; Return of the Jedi, and he said, “daddy, that black guy, I can’t understand what he was saying.” Referring to Darth Vader. As children, we have no concept of racism or sexism until we learn it. So how do we break the cycle? It’s not as easy as finding a black man and giving him a hug and whispering “I understand.” Start becoming aware of everything you say, think and do. You will certainly find that our society is geared toward oppressing black people and women. Black people are still treated as second class people and sex is such a taboo topic that women are made out to be nothing more than erotic fodder. If you are a white male, this does not mean you should befriend a bunch of random black people and start a black rights movement; or start some new womens lib movement.
Our government wants us dumb and separtate from one another. You can deviate from your normal reading and read something written by a woman or a black author, and if you don’t read then start reading or get it on audio book format because there is no longer an excuse to not be intelligent unless you sit in front of the television waiting to be spoon fed your beliefs by the mass media. Get out and help in a community different than yours. There is no excuse for racism or any other ism’s for that matter.
Our society is based on medieval Christian principles of fear mongering and sexual shame (wether you want to believe it or not). When you were a child did you catch your parents having sex? If so, what was their reaction when you caught them? Did they scurry around like cockroaches then shunning the entire act as if it were shameful? That is the way most people in our country think, and why? Because of the old crusty folks running the country and making laws. Sex is everywhere and even though it is pleasurable and is a natural part of life that brings more life, it is taboo in the united states.
In Europe, there are naked statues and billboards all over the place and not just because of Roman statues. Imagine though, if all those Roman statues were here in the united states. The u.s. government would spend tons of money to either relocate them or put clothes on them. It makes me wonder about people who think sex is a bad thing. Do they only have sex when they want to have a child? That would mean that my wife and I have only had sex twice if that was the case. On the contrary, when you see a married couple with two children, that means they have had sex at least twice, or adopted two children, or the stork came twice. If our society seems sex crazed and depraved it’s because we are. In countries where sex is treated as a normal part of living, sex crimes are almost non existent. Because of the repression of sex in this country, there are millions of different porn sites with every sick fantasy fulfilled.
Things are so bad here that women cannot breastfeed in public without erecting a full enclosure around themselves so that nobody sees their breasts. There have been extreme cases of women getting arrested for indecent exposure in public while breastfeeding, because somebody else was offended. My wife is extremely offended that she cannot have her shirt off on a hot day (which I support fully) and an obese man with ‘man boobs’ can because. . .he is a man, or because they don’t produce milk which is the devils drink. Women have been subordinated since the rise of Christianity in the world. In order for men to hold all the power in ‘the church’ of christianity, women had to be completely suppresed which meant that the virgin Mary was still as pure as a filty woman could be because she did not have sex. It is also widely argued that Jesus had a wife and children but all that was stricken from the records as there could be no real female equal to ‘the son of god’ right?
It is not necessarily sex but women that are held as ‘dirty’ in our society. If a man sleeps with too many women to count, he is just being a man and if a woman does it she is a dirty whore. I am not a male feminist but I do believe in equality and feel that this is a good place to start. Women are still not treated equally as men in our society just as black people are not treated the same as white people. What do we do about this? If you are a woman and proud of your sexuality, take your shirt off on the next hot day. So what if you have a bra on, it is the same as a bikini top right? As a matter of fact, get right down to your underwear (as long as it is not a thong and lacy bra with your nipples showing because that could get you arrested). As far as black people being oppressed, that is a topic for another discussion.
Ah yes, my point. Sex is a part of the natural life cycle and should be accepted as such in our country. I’m not saying that sex in public should be legal but if we took less of a shameful approach to it we might be better off in the long run. We have a chance to do it differently than our parents did. After I caught my parents in the act (I’m still scarred), they regrouped, went out and bought a book entitled ‘What’s Happening to Me?’. Several days after the ordeal, my father was elected to hand it to me in a very matter-of-factly manner and said, “let us know if you have any questions.” Yes, just one question. If everyone has the potential to procreate (except for men with small penises or hermaphrodites), then why is it so hard to discuss. Rule of thumb with children. . .only answer the questions they ask and when they ask about a topic that seems difficult, DO NOT LIE to them, because they need to learn about life and death, that flatulence is okay, and sex is a good thing. Start there. Go.
Pot, weed, mary jane, reefer, or whatever you want to call it. Marijuana is a plant and technically considered a weed. Why is it illegal then? Let’s not look at the bullshit reasons that the right wing propaganda machine cooked up decades ago with movies like ‘Reefer Madness’. If you’ve ever seen that movie (you were probably getting high), you would know it is absolutely hilarious. In the movie, people go insane and jump out of windows which is what the general public associated with the plant around the time when it was considered a drug. Here is what doesn’t make sense. In 1988 the FDA conducted a study on THC (tetrahydracannibanol) and found that it was “the safest theraputic substance know to man.” How is weed illegal and cigarettes are legal? Cigarettes actually have surgeon general warnings on them that say things like “Cigarettes have been known to cause deformities in babies and cancer in everyone else.” So why is something so theraputic, (and well documented in decreasing nausea especially in chemotherapy patients) illegal. It is actually been so proven at so many things that there are multiple states in the united states that allow medical marijuana licenses. This blows my mind. I can go to a doctor and tell her that I have chronic back pain from a car accident 20 years ago and she will write me a script that allows me to be high whenever I need to. Why is it still illegal then? There are 3major reasons:
1. Pharmaceutical companies
2. Textile industry
3. Law enforcement funds
Pharmaceutical companies are just as bad as any insurance company or oil company. It is a HUGE multi-billion if not trillion dollar industry all based on synthetically derived ingredients that have to be tested on a certain amount of willing participants and only cause serious side effects in 10% of them and only kill less than 1% of said lab rats/humans. I don’t think that marijuana has ever killed anyone. Do you know what happens when you smoke too much marijuana? You pass out, then wake up and eat. Of course it makes sense that something so theraputically safe and can aid in nausea, chronic pain, glaucoma, and many other ailments would be made illegal, because pharmaceutical companies would stand to lose all funding for product development and would not be able to mark up their latest wonder drug by 400%. So with their deep pockets, these drug companies give ‘gifts’ to their local politicians who in turn pass favorable laws for pharmeceutical companies and make herbs and homeopathics look like witch doctor voo doo and things like marijuana illegal.
Hemp has been know to produce very good clothing, paper, rope and many other things that I probably don’t know of. Since the hemp plant (the male species of marijuana) is a weed, it grows as such which means it requires very little attention or care and can offer products at one tenth of the cost of cotton, trees, or any other billion dollar textile industry. Imagine having a plant that provides all of the wonderful products (while the female counterpart provides a yummy feeling) with no guilt of deforestation, or use of pesticides. However in 1937, the Marijuana Transfer Tax Act went into effect, which destroyed the hemp industry as a cheap replacement to William Randolf Hearst’s timber for his newspapers and other wealthy people’s interests (Andrew Mellon, secretary of Treasury and the Dupont family) in other fibers such as Dupont nylon. The reasons for hemp being included in this law are merely speculative though.
DEA, FBI, CIA, and all other menacing government acronyms that go after ‘drugs’ and drug dealers get funding for such ventures and marijuana is classified as a drug. Currently, Mexico is battling the local drug cartels and Obama is trying to help them crack down on the drug trade. What if we just made marijuana legal so that the government could regulate the growing and dispensation and get tax revenues from it? Oh yeah, there are too many ultra-conservatives in this country and see also ‘pharmeceutical companies and their pet politicans’.
Pot smokers happen to be some of the most laid back and hungry individuals I’ve ever met, and their hemp clothing among the most comfortable and functional on the planet. So why is this plant still illegal? Prohibition only lasted from 1920 to 1933 and was repealed after bootlegging made many people including the Kennedy’s very wealthy. So why is our crappy government giving all of their god given revenue to gangs and hippies?
So, “what’s wrong with
society,” you ask? Too many people wanting too many things and a majority of
them don’t care what resources were raped or who died to make their designer
clothes and handbags. Your corporate
latte carries the blood and sweat of third world slaves, and your high fructose
corn syrup, chemical laden “food” is the cause of all your physical and mental
ailments. What if peak oil hits and only
the very rich can afford gas? Democrats are depicted as un-American tree-huggers who want to shut down
NASCAR and oil drilling, while Republicans use the GOP “force” to assure us
that there is no such thing as global climate change. Here’s an idea, stop driving your 8 miles-to-the-gallon,
power-plant of a diesel truck to get your blood coffee and instead ride your
the agricultural revolution some 10,000 years ago, the rise of civilizations
began the forward march of overpopulating the planet and consuming all
available resources as quickly as possible.
Forget peak oil. What about peak
water? All the water we will ever have is here right now. There is no rain god in the sky crying to
give us a fresh supply. The mercury,
antibiotics, oil and hormones from contraceptive devices are only a few of the
wonderful additions currently found in our oceans. If the consumerism continues, you will have
to fly to South America to see the last protected patch of nature on the planet
where the indigenous tribes will all be considered endangered species and given
helmet cams so we can view them on the latest reality TV show. Meanwhile, bottled water companies will have
the only drinkable water left in the world and will sell water purification
systems for the cost of a home, but you will pay the second mortgage because
you need water.
my current pilgrimage, I have learned that everyone and everything are all one. Even the neighbor you don’t like because he
starts his Harley up at midnight and has loud drinking parties in his driveway
until sunrise is part of you. It may
sound soft to some people, but we need to have compassion for the real estate
and insurance agents who take our hard earned money, buy luxury cars, and put
their advertisement sticker on the side so they can write the vehicle off as a
business expense. These people are
greedy and power hungry and may never feel fulfillment or true joy. We need to compassionately hand over the
check for the medical bill that the insurance company wouldn’t cover due to a
“pre-exsisting condition” and others will have compassion for you.
When my wife gave birth
to our second child, I wrote a humorous book The End of Days Survival Guide, quit my job willingly, sold our
house, bought a pop-up camper and headed to the West Coast. My book is an awakening piece that really
brought forth my anger toward our society and what it does to people. Humanity cannot continue on the current path
set forth, and the Earth has its own energy and ideas for “cleansing” itself of
us. Do I believe that humanity will come
crashing to an abrupt end? No, but we are currently being brought to the brink
and shown that our adaptive skills will need to be used very soon. My book discusses becoming a marauder,
converting your truck into a “deathmobile”, and what firearms to fill your castle
with; but the underlying message is to break free of society’s hold and live
your life. The End of Days Survival Guide by Philip
Mackey will be available on Amazon June 7th.
This book was a means
of maintaining sanity while working at my typical middle American 9-5 drone
position, and it helped me to figure out exactly what I wanted to do with my
efforts while on this planet. I want to
teach my children kindness and compassion for others. I want to raise them instead of random
daycare strangers who take care of a generation of bratty, overindulgent
children. I want to spend time with my
wife instead of waiting until we retire to get to know each other all over
again. That should not be too much to